


the first days

by Angelfabeth



Category: Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005), Torchwood
Genre: Amnesia, Angst, Brain Damage, Gen, Not Canon Compliant, Traumatic Injury
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-20
Updated: 2017-04-20
Packaged: 2018-10-21 04:20:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10677570
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Angelfabeth/pseuds/Angelfabeth
Summary: Ponds gone? [CONFIRMED]The Doctor? [E R R O R]





	the first days

**Author's Note:**

> Not Angels of Manhattan compliant.

The Doctor woke up.

He blinked heavy eyelids even as his mind chased after the fading fragments of his dreams. The feeling of forgetting something overwhelmed him for a moment and the world seemed to spin out from under him. He racked his brain for what it could be. What could he have possibly dreamt about that could leave him so disoriented? Giving it up as a lost cause, he shook away the last cobwebs of sleep and swung his legs over the side of the leather chair which made his temporary bed, and got to his feet. 

Suddenly it hit him like Jackie Tyler in a strop. 

Oh. Right. 

Of course. 

Taking a fortifying breath and trying to ignore the gaping chasm which split open in his chest (notheartsneverhearts), the Doctor pulled himself to his full height and fixed a paper grin to his face. 

First day without the Ponds. 

He could do this. 

With a burst of movement, he began the take off sequence and hit the randomiser. If his flourishes and twirls were more subdued than usual, no one was there to comment on it. 

From scuba diving in the liquid crystal seas of Alimae IV to curing a pandemic on Wyrro beta, the Doctor ran. Each stop was brief, barely setting foot on each planet before taking off again. He left a string of planets who would tell tales of a benevolent ghost whose presence was as fleeting as his smiles. 

Staggering into the TARDIS and trying to ignore the pounding in his head, the Doctor blearily set his next destination. It wasn't until he had landed that he realised just where his subconscious had taken him. Well he supposed it was long past its due date. He couldn't even remember the last time he had refuelled. 

There was a figure waiting for him when he finally bounded out of the TARDIS. 

 "Captain Jack!" He enthused. "Long time no see." 

"It's good to see you, Doctor." Jack's answering smile was warm but weary. It was a mark of how much the Doctor was trying to ignore his own fatigue that he completely missed the edge to Jack's grin. 

The alarm that suddenly sounded from Jack's pocket lead to several frantic hours of alien invasions, running, and whipped cream, all ending with an exhausted but satisfied team.

The Doctor had planned to quietly slip back into his TARDIS to escape both his throbbing headache and Jack's increasingly concerned glances, but was foiled by a strong hand wrapping around his arm and halting him in his tracks. 

"You know you could always stay for a bit. Wind down." Jack remarked with forced casualness. 

The Doctor laughed, and neither remarked on how high and brittle it was. "Well, you know me. Always on the go."

"Yeah, don't I know it." Jack paused for a long moment, choosing his next words carefully. "Just- remember to take care of yourself." 

"Me?" The Doctor scoffed. "I always take care of myself. I'm a take carer-er. Or a self baby sitter. No wait, that's not what I am." The Doctor said, making a face. "Don't ever let me say that again. I'm not a baby or a sitter. I am myself though." 

Jack winced but painted on a smile and released his hand. "I'll see you soon, Doctor."  

"Oh I wouldn't be too sure about soon, you know how I am, but I'm sure I'll turn up eventually at some point in the future or past. You humans always seem to need saving." The Doctor babbled, relieved. "I'll be off now." He quickly ducked inside and shut the door behind him, missing the way Jack's face crumpled. The Doctor made a move towards the console but a wave of exhaustion knocked him off his feet and onto one of the leather pilot chairs that helpfully appeared. 

Well, he supposed one small nap couldn't hurt. It _had_ to be the next day by now...

 

 

The Doctor woke up. 

 

Breathe. In. Out. 

 

First day without the Ponds. 

 

He could do this.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah so I tried foreshadowing and hinting but if it wasn't clear, the Doctor lost the Ponds in an accident (not Angels of Manhattan) and got a brain injury which gives him anterograde amnesia (so he can't remember anything after the accident). So he keeps reliving the first day over and over again. 
> 
> (For a bit of added angst, look closely at the names of the planets he went to)


End file.
